The... What? Stages of Nostalgia? Gimmie a break...

So I've been rather nostalgic lately... I'm often nostalgic. Not even to a certain time, mind you, but towards my life in general. I'm a very lucky man, and I've had a great life, so there's a lot to look back fondly on/ Call it bragging if you'd like, but I've made it a point to enjoy as much of my life as I can, and it provides much rosier glasses for reflection, in addition to the myriad of other obvious benefits of accentuating the positive.

But then, in this random moment, the nostalgia turned bitter. I have no idea what brought it on- it's hardly been a bad day... or a bad couple weeks. There's plenty to look forward to. But this bitterness came on strong, and I could- dumb as it sounds- almost feel it trying to take root in my heart. I suppose it was like trading out rosy colored glasses for ones shaded with... resentment? decay?

Maybe it's got something to do with the feeling like I'm the only one (well, not ONLY one...) interested in hanging onto the past. I don't think my best days are behind me- far from it- but I consider it a beautiful thing if you can have just one friend that you have known for 10... 15... 20 years. The only thing better is to have more than one. Or a dozen. Call me old-fashioned, but a friend who I have 15 years invested in is worth a hell of a lot to me, simply by virtue of the time invested. They're someone I want to hang onto. And that puts me in a pretty small minority.

"Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on to. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, for as the older you get, the more you'll need the people you knew when you were young."

Random quotes from 90s music aside, I think the bitterness was the feeling of isolation from people I had really wanted to hang on to. And the reason I knew that sleep wasn't coming to me anytime soon. So, instead, I'll send out one more whiny-ass bitchy blog into the world for no reason other than my own piece of mind. Whats the point of a blog no one reads, you might ask? So you can feel no guilt sharing that which no one wants to hear. Hell, I don't want to listen to it either... that's what makes the whole damn thing so cathartic.